A Twelve-Year-Old’s To Do List
February 19, 2009 By: almostgotit Category: Uncategorized, humor, organization, parenting, time management, writingBecause I only have a very boring To Do List today, I thought I’d borrow a more interesting one from my daughter who tends to write and post such things on her bedroom door.
Ten Useless Things To Do
1. Paint your room black. Say that this is so you can hide from Them more easily. Refuse to further discuss the matter.
2. Decide to speak in German all day. Extra points if you don’t actually know German.
3. Call a real estate agent and see if you can have a house delivered to you that evening. When he/she refuses, complain that if you can do it with pizza, you should be able to get houses that way too.
4. Sign your name as “Pooh Bear IV” on your homework from now on.
5. Tell your teacher that you are going to be a caveman when you grow up and therefore do not need to learn math.
6. Declare a new holiday. Name it after yourself.
7. Turn the thermostat down low and pour a few gallons of water on the floor. Attach metal blades to your sneakers with duct tape. See if you can ice-skate.
8. Say your bed sprained its ankle. Sleep on the floor for a couple of weeks.
9. Read all the cookbooks you can find. See if any of them have a recipe for a knuckle sandwich.
10. Call 911. Explain that you are bored, and ask if you could go for a ride in one of the fire trucks.
February 19th, 2009 at 6:01 pm
I feel so very honored.
February 19th, 2009 at 6:05 pm
And so you ought. Tell your fans, though: did you *really* make these all up yourself?
February 19th, 2009 at 7:29 pm
Inspiring!
February 20th, 2009 at 1:24 am
I love this kid!
February 20th, 2009 at 1:45 am
Your daughter is wise beyond her years.
P.S.: I have heard that orange is a better color for camouflage because it hurts Their eyes to look at it.
February 20th, 2009 at 9:37 am
A small contribution from my own teenager: attach the leaf blower to the skateboard with duct tape; no further explanation needed.
February 20th, 2009 at 10:22 am
I like numbers 2 and 9 best. Never thought of a bed with a sprained ankle, but I can really picture it!
February 20th, 2009 at 11:35 am
Welcome back, Rufus — and Marsquat, you know the feeling is mutual. @Dennis: my kid may be wise, but I’ll be sure to give her heads up re orange so she can get even wiser. @ALTOS: LOVE the leaf-blower-on-skateboard idea — whereever would we be without duct tape, is what I want to know? @lavenderbay: yep, and her dresser has tendonitis.
February 20th, 2009 at 8:58 pm
Why, yes, they are compleletly original
February 21st, 2009 at 2:58 am
I love this kid, too. Wasn’t she just climbing walls yesterday? I’ll have to forward to the 13 y/o in our family…
February 21st, 2009 at 5:21 pm
This girl is lucky she actually has her own bedroom door. I think I may want to try the caveman solution.-horseloverinc. (Susannah’s daughter, Margaret)